The Holocaust under Attack

BREAKING NEWS

AriadNews, Aug.7, 2016 — . A report obtained by us from a highly confidential source in Jerusalem informs that Prime Minister Netanyahu has been admitted for observation in the exclusive clinic for neurologic disorders מהומה (popularly known in Israel as Meshugenot). The ambulance arrived during a press conference he had called unexpectedly in which his behavior had become erratic and he had made some shocking statements.

He said: Six million Jews survived! Rejoice!

Looking haggard and agitated, he told the reporters that for the previous two weeks he had been reading “Hitler’s War” by David Irving  (a convicted Holocaust denier). “Couldn’t put it down,” he said. I sobbed with happiness. But now I am angry.

We were deceived! The blame goes to the US and the Soviet Union: they rigged the Nuremberg trials. They came up with the lamp shades and the shrunken heads.”

The reporters thought this was some weird prank of his, so one of them asked sarcastically: “So are we going to give back the reparations received?”

He thundered: “Don’t you all get it? The Nazi wanted to annihilate us, they wanted to kill us, but they failed! Jews are blessed. The Holocaust reparations should be repaid by the US and Russia, the Soviet Union’s successor. They also owe us reparations for the incalculable moral suffering and trauma we endured because of this monumental lie.”

An aide tried to pull him aside and whispered something in his ear, but he swatted him away. At this point the ambulance had arrived and, as he was being led gently toward it, he turned his head and added with a strange snort and giggle: “I’m reading Shlomo Sand now!”

An unidentified officer came to the mike and told the hushed audience: “The Prime Minister has been under enormous stress ever since the US started negotiating with Iran. He needs rest. We appreciate your doing your job responsibly and not letting this unfortunate incident get out of this room. It would embolden the deniers and the anti-semites.”

No one in the Israeli government and no one at the State Department was available to comment on this exclusive report so we could not confirm it.


The Holocaust is coming under attack nowadays more and more often. The recent change in authorship of Ann Franks’ Diary has stimulated the deniers who had long nitpicked it for silly reasons (ballpoint pen! as if what matters is the writing instrument).

Now a German (!) who had brazenly challenged the Holocaust facts and figures and was rightfully and lawfully sentenced, a denier and obvious anti-semite who had the incredible nerve to say,
“Jews can do anything in Germany, including lie and betray? They are untouchable?”
was acquitted on appeal!
If this can happen in Germany after decades of re-education, what can we expect in other places?

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